Hello,I am James Wier's mother, Lisa. There is the " before me " and the " after" me. The first one laughed more, trusted more, hoped more, and believed that no matter how hard the situation was for the moment, it was temporary, and eventually everything would turn out all right. My husband and children were my life, I made that decision,and never regretted it. I was enjoying the company of sons that were now grown, a daughter blossoming in beauty and wit, a wonderful daughter in law, and a beautiful grand daughter.I could see the future as a welcome friend, beconing me to its slower, softer pace. I was going to be the happy, bubbly  and fun grandmother


  David and I were married in the spring of 1971 , two happy, giddy, teen agers so marviously in love. Ten months later we had our first son, David Christopher, and a year later I gave birth to our second son, James Matthew. We had the usual ups and downs, short on money and long on love.David  Christopher developed severe asthma and allergies and the first 17 years of his life were spent in and out of hospitals.

David played in nightclubs for many years as a second job. I took care of other children, was a pre school and Sunday School teacher and ten years after having our first child, we had a daughter, Shannon Michelle. Standing in the grocery line, James once turned to me, looking me up and down loudly proclaimed I was too old to have a baby. I was the decrepit  age of 28 .                                                    

As the years rolled by, I renovated an old house, wallpapering, pulling up dining room carpet and tiling it myself, painting the inside,and 3 feet from being completely finished on the outside, I fell off the ladder cracking my knee cap and being covered head to toe in paint, I crawled into the house, bather and shaved and put on make up and then went  to see what I had done to my leg.

Later on I took up cake decorating, refinishing antique furniture,writing wedding invitations,place cards and certificates handwritten in calligraphy. I make floral arrangements, bridal bouquets, corsages,boutineers, floor lengh wedding veils, cake toppers and satin and lace wedding and anniversary books

I enjoy playing the piano,but have found it difficult to do since James died. I have gotten back into doing more landscaping around the house. I have written stories and poems, but very sporadically, although my husband has been pushing me for several years to start back writing on a more regular basis. How ironic

 that the one bit of writing I have been doing is a journal of sorrow that I started after the death of James.

The " after" me  doubts more, fears more, trys to keep the mind continually occupied to keep despair from completely devouring me. I used to be a voracious reader of horror books and now cautiously pick one up,not wanting to read anything that may remind me of a son cut down in life before he really got to live.Each day is a struggle beginning with the knowledge that with each passing day I am leaving James further away in the past, the gap growing wider and wider. It takes an inordinate amount of energy to do the everyday things I used to not think twice about.....like when asked how many children do I have & I have gained 25 pounds since James died using food to medicate my pain and now battling to get the extra weight off. I live in guilt for the the mother I am now, and the one my son and daughter will not see again, and my grandchildren will never know


More Pages  about James Wier

 In Memory of 
James Matthew Wier
Tears (Car & Cemetery)   Just Beyond Your Touch|   God's Masterpiece
Never    To Remember Me About Lisa 
(James' Mother


 Do You Really Want to Understand   The Invitation Elephant in the Room   Butt prints in the Sand
Life's Weaving    Death is Nothing At All We Give Them Back To You I Only Wanted You
Eternal Ink   The Other Side of the Door  When Tomorrow Starts Without Me   Don't Grieve
Now in Gods garden


Bits of Wisdom  The Power of Forgiveness   The Gift of True Friends 

Funshine Pages

When God Created Fathers   When I'm an Old Lady

Memorials to Other Friends 

Harold D Lawson Donor Mom's site

Helpful Resources  on Grief

Helpful Links About Grief  Coping With Death
Please sign our Guest Book

View Our Guest Book